OH JAY, JAY, JAY....

i like to torture myself...

i was listening to jay severin again on the radio, and he's taken to calling democrats (and all leftist demographics) 'democrats' and all conservatives 'patriots,' which by definition makes me unpatriotic.

here's a little ethics lesson for jay severin.

if patriotism means i do not have the right to sit in my own house doing whatever the fuck i feel like, hurting no one, thinking whatever the fuck i want, and not fucking with anyone else's right to do whatever the fuck they want to themselves... then yea... i'm not a patriot. in fact, if that's your definition of patriotism, you can shove patriotism right up your self-righteous ass. you can fuck right off, you hate-crime-soliciting kitten fuckers.

i happen to believe in individual rights, and i happen to believe that in a functional democracy the most sacred of all ideologies is the respect for individual rights. Tom DeLay can go fondle anyone he likes and go on his merry way, and you won't hear a peep from me, but i will not look the other way when he shysters 2.5 million in lobbyist money into his pockets while po' white trash in Texas lose health care, education, and the very basic needs to survive and pull themselves out of the debt slavery these 'patriots' have created for them.

patriotism means believing in a community that does not allow these villains to get away with murder at the expense of those who only ask for the elementary tools of survival. that's what i believe...

i also believe Giada de Laurentiis is fucking hot.

which brings me to my second point; if we as a culture are to defend and preserve our basic right to freedom (and for chrissake, don't mistake my definition of freedom as the 'let-the-eagle-soar' freedom, mine is the 'real freedom is responsibility' species), we need to appeal to the most universal and powerful of all human elements: fucking. we all know rick santorum goes home and jerks off to little league (again, it's his business what he does in the privacy of his own home... none of my business a'tall), and most southern, ultraconservatives make their underage, african-american mistresses call them 'Stonewall,' so it appears obvious to me that the most widespread, universal, and dare i say unifying activity is good, solid, american fucking.

uh-huh. let's use that, shall we?

do something positive america! find someone you care about and bang away! stop yer hatin' and start yer lovin'

i consider it to be your most important civic duty.

and another thing: get your goddamn hands off my NPR, motherfuckers.

that is all.