12.25.2004

THE HOLIDAY

and so dear readers, it's time for me to deliver my holiday message to y'all. i went to church last night with my mom, rather i was coerced into going because i am not really that religious, but it was a good experience in that i got to see which of my childhood compatriots went and got themselves hot... or married... or gay... but i was mostly concerned with hot. generally, the girls from church have just swollen some in the 5 or so years since i was last there, but there were a few that surprised me. fair play to you ladies. anyway, i digress... it was quite odd to be at church because i don't care much for organized religion, but it's good to see things are improving. About a year ago, i went for a solo hike out in western Mass and on my way back, stoned to the bjesus on Kodiak and screaming James Taylor songs at the top of my lungs, stripped to my undies with the top down on my car, i got to thinking about what defines my sense of spirituality. in my heightened state of self-awareness, i believe i got as close to nailing it down as i've ever been: i happened to look east and see one single tree standing above the others, and i thought "God is the tallest tree in the forest, and that is all i'll ever need to understand." About six months later i found out that tree was really a cell phone tower disguised to look like a tree. so that sucked. anyway... i forgot what the fuck all this had to do with christmas... i guess there's a god connection there somewhere.... OH- remembered: got to talking with some right-wing redneck dude at a bar (nice guy, went to middleschool together), and he was all "i'm tired of all this touchy-feely PC bullshit! no one's going to tell ME i can't say 'merry christmas'!" then he turned around and said 'merry christmas' to a Jewish guy.... priceless. hope you all had a wonderful time with family and friends, and i hope the majority of you got drunk this weekend and slept with someone who went to your highschool. cheers-

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