FOR PFIEF

caught the train early last night to have a drink with a young family friend over whom i hold a 'protect and serve' position (i.e. you touch her, i'm supposed to bash your head in).... pretty tall order considering my... um... 'swimmer's build.' it's a courtesy. dad asked me real nice like, and i used to play basketball for her granddad, so i do my best to watch out for her, you know, make sure she doesn't get screwed on a lease, pay her fare if she pukes in the cab... standard big-brother stuff.

not so bad, right? well, someone once told me that women are kinda like snowflakes... each one has her own unique kind of crazy. this one is no exception. after working in her current job for exactly 4 days, she's managed to fall in love with someone there, and drive another kid to quit his job out of heartbroken anguish. (at this point in her story i'm fighting the urge to snort guinness out my nose i'm laughing so hard). 4 days. and to prove her point, she gets him on the phone and convinces him to take a 30 min cab ride at 2 am to come see her.

this sort of thing happened to me once.... in 6th grade i think.

stumbling home, i started thinking how crazy that was (and how i was going to have to whup someone's ass sooner or later.... it's a shame, billy ray's a peaceful man), but maybe not so crazy. what's wrong with a little impulsiveness now and again?

so next time i hear someone's getting kicked out of a bar for gettin' it on in the bathroom, or trading sex for coke, i think i'll be a little more patient.

after all... my ass is going back to school next year.

and god bless comedy central for running Real Genius every saturday morning. and god bless Real Genius... 'as soon as we apply a field, we couple to a state that is radiatively coupled to the ground state'? sure. 'It's possible to synthesize excited bromide in and argon matrix?' why not. and Reckless, how badly do you want a video montage in your life right now?

jesus christ, am i hungover this morning.